the future

Like I've said before, I have a bunch of changes that'll be taking place in my life. I'm not happy right now and I'm going to be working toward fixing that. I haven't been myself completely in a long time. I feel a lot more optimistic about my future right now. I'm going to be working again, losing weight, focusing completely on myself, being young and having fun. Based on my intuition and gut feeling, I got my old job back at Rue 21 in Sherman. I had been there basically since I graduated high school up until my 21st birthday. If there's anyone that knows me best, it's Danielle and Ashley. I've missed them and rue, it's kind of like my second home. I feel like I'm having an identy crisis and they've seen me go through everything, know me, and helped me become the person I am today. Maybe I'll be able to find myself there again too. In about two weeks, it'll be at south by southwest. I'll be going with three of my best friends and other people that'll make it a fun experience. I'm getting my tattoo during then and we'll be in the best sense of chaos! I feel like after then, I'll be a lot better, psychologically and emotionally. I'll just feel a lot happier with everything again. I have a lot of things coming in the future that I'm looking forward to. Carolyn will be back the week after SXSW, I'll be taking my license test then and getting the two piercings that I've been planning. In April, Micah and I will be going back to Austin, finally staying at the Hilton next to 6th street and seeing one our favorite bands. We both have been working toward losing weight. I have about nineteen pounds left to my ultimate goal weight and we've both figured that we'll be at our ultimate goal weight by then. As a reward, we'll be going on a big shopping spree. THEN, I will be changing my living situation that I've been unhappy with. I can't say much, but there will definitely be more parties at The Chamber of Secrets and a special "coming out" party in May. When we moved in, I had bought a limited amount of furniture and furnishings for my apartment, I had always intended on decorating even further... but without a job, I really didn't think it would be appropriate. Now, that I'll be working again and I will be making some permanent changes to my apartment... I'm going to finally be adding to it. I've also come to hate walking into my apartment, I guess if walls could talk... SO, I will be transforming it into something completely different. Something a little more grown up and more of how I originally wanted the apartment to look. I will also be having to do major changes to my room, but I'm not quite sure what those will be at this time.

It's going to be a very retro-modern feel. I can't wait for all of this! I can't wait to be happy again. I can't wait to have everything that I've been dreaming about. I'm ready and stoked for the future again. I feel everything coming back together, but I hate waiting for everything to happen. I think I'll feel more like myself in May, maybe not so much as the old me... but a new improved version! May will begin the fourth year that I've been out of school. As I've always been thinking that I'm just wasting my time, I'll have my last worry-free summer and begin cosmetology school in the fall. Perhaps in Dallas... or perhaps somewhere new. My lease is up in September and I don't really have anything to keep me here anymore. I need a change and maybe Austin will be the right fit! Regardless of what happens... I'm excited for everything that's coming up!